destroyed
how do you know that the hurt will stop?
how do you know that the sun will rise?
it's like being pushed. someone's pushing you one way, another one's pulling you in the same way, but you try and you try and you try to run in the other direction. cuz that's where you want to go. and then when you do ask for help, they stop and say that it's been there all along. but when you're lost in a big world, where there's no space for mistakes and no comfort cept for the ones you leave behind, you do need their help. it doesn't get easier, it gets harder.
we ask too much we give too little. we're like the army, we sign you up, take everything and leave you nothing. yes, you're right. we whine and whinge and get so terribly confused that we yell and scream that you're not give us what we need.
but that's why i love you and i trust you. when the hurricanes start and my world disappears, you always make things right. why am i insecure? cuz people get tired of picking up the broken pieces, and fixing them together. like you have before. and my love is just... love. why does size, colour, distance, brains and more become an issue? because i still stop and marvel at the fact that you love me. love is just love, it can't stop the world and it can't do anything. and that's all i have.
i'm like a child. i always am and always will. i'm not the woman who can change the world, i'm the girl who stays home and wonders what life has to give. i want to be so much, but all my adventure and all my desire is very firmly rooted in love. too romantic, too airy-fairy, too damn childish. i'm sorry. i'd love to be able to be confident, trust and stop doubting. it's not really that easy to live with insecurity. if i could make it go away, trust me i would.
but i can't. i'm so sorry, but i can't. why do i need the reminders, it's been years and years and years. but it's what i live for. you are right, you do need space. but i need to know how much, and i need to know details. space to? live your own life? have dinner? time and space are the two hardest words for girls like me to hear. simply because we think differently from you. and too much.
rence, it's not the uni that's hard for us. that's just a cover. it's leaving our innocence, knowing that we have to look out for ourselves. maybe we expect too much, but being looked after and treasured is so important to us. some women just can't be independant. call it lazy, say that we don't want to. but when once you rushed to pick us up and hold us tight, you now look and say, oh well, we've been through much worse, it's about time you learnt. you have bmt, we need bwmt, basic without men training. walking through fire is nothing compared to learning to love the man that your boy has become. we're so proud of you, we wished we were a part of that something that suddenly makes you a man. yes it does, and we don't know or understand why. something almost magical happens after your posting, you grow up overnight and we don't understand it. the torture of the whole experience is something that some girls actually want to understand. not because it's torturous, or we have something to prove, but because it makes all the difference in the world. you can call a girl a lady, or a woman, but the difference between a boy and a man is so vast. and we're afraid that you've become so strong and manly, that why do you need us. girls like me need to be needed. in need, we find purpose.
the light of fires fade in the winter.
and it's so damn long to spring.
i'm so sorry.
how do you know that the sun will rise?
it's like being pushed. someone's pushing you one way, another one's pulling you in the same way, but you try and you try and you try to run in the other direction. cuz that's where you want to go. and then when you do ask for help, they stop and say that it's been there all along. but when you're lost in a big world, where there's no space for mistakes and no comfort cept for the ones you leave behind, you do need their help. it doesn't get easier, it gets harder.
we ask too much we give too little. we're like the army, we sign you up, take everything and leave you nothing. yes, you're right. we whine and whinge and get so terribly confused that we yell and scream that you're not give us what we need.
but that's why i love you and i trust you. when the hurricanes start and my world disappears, you always make things right. why am i insecure? cuz people get tired of picking up the broken pieces, and fixing them together. like you have before. and my love is just... love. why does size, colour, distance, brains and more become an issue? because i still stop and marvel at the fact that you love me. love is just love, it can't stop the world and it can't do anything. and that's all i have.
i'm like a child. i always am and always will. i'm not the woman who can change the world, i'm the girl who stays home and wonders what life has to give. i want to be so much, but all my adventure and all my desire is very firmly rooted in love. too romantic, too airy-fairy, too damn childish. i'm sorry. i'd love to be able to be confident, trust and stop doubting. it's not really that easy to live with insecurity. if i could make it go away, trust me i would.
but i can't. i'm so sorry, but i can't. why do i need the reminders, it's been years and years and years. but it's what i live for. you are right, you do need space. but i need to know how much, and i need to know details. space to? live your own life? have dinner? time and space are the two hardest words for girls like me to hear. simply because we think differently from you. and too much.
rence, it's not the uni that's hard for us. that's just a cover. it's leaving our innocence, knowing that we have to look out for ourselves. maybe we expect too much, but being looked after and treasured is so important to us. some women just can't be independant. call it lazy, say that we don't want to. but when once you rushed to pick us up and hold us tight, you now look and say, oh well, we've been through much worse, it's about time you learnt. you have bmt, we need bwmt, basic without men training. walking through fire is nothing compared to learning to love the man that your boy has become. we're so proud of you, we wished we were a part of that something that suddenly makes you a man. yes it does, and we don't know or understand why. something almost magical happens after your posting, you grow up overnight and we don't understand it. the torture of the whole experience is something that some girls actually want to understand. not because it's torturous, or we have something to prove, but because it makes all the difference in the world. you can call a girl a lady, or a woman, but the difference between a boy and a man is so vast. and we're afraid that you've become so strong and manly, that why do you need us. girls like me need to be needed. in need, we find purpose.
the light of fires fade in the winter.
and it's so damn long to spring.
i'm so sorry.
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on Wednesday, September 14, 2005 at 12:35 AM.
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